As I think about the uns and res of grief, a story comes to mind that happened in a grief education and support group years ago. Several women whose husbands had died were talking about how the way they spent their time had been undone. One woman said she used to sit and watch sporting events with her husband but doesnt anymore. Instead, she had revised how she spends her time and watches operas, something her husband never did. Other women shared similar stories. They all found ways to take the unraveling in their lives and reclaim a sense of empowerment. The grief journey is a constant dance between the uns and the res.